Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Does money matter in Marriage?

I can't remember I and hubby ever discussed money matters prior to our marriage. However, I do believe that money issues should be dealt with before marriage such as in the case that one party has tons of debts before the tying of knot; otherwise, it will create conflicts later. A big number of divorce/separation cases is related to money so the key here is honesty through open communication to come up with an agreement, understanding or a compromise.

In my own marriage of 16 years, I and hubby have many downs in terms of money but we've never allowed money issue to ruin us, instead it has made us even stronger in our relationship as we figure things out and together we find solutions.

It is not necessary to have the same spending habits or styles to have a harmonious marriage. What is important is, both should agree about short term and long term goals that involve money. For instance, if eating out regularly say once a week is one spouse's goal but the other is not happy about it as s/he prefers to just cook at home which is less expensive and where they can bond together freely, then this issue should be discussed openly and come up with the best solution or a compromise as the issue here is not only about money but also the psychological aspect of destressing oneself. Another example is purchasing gadgets. If one spouse loves to change gadget every new model comes out, this has to be seriously considered and each spouse should learn how to identify needs and wants, frugality and luxury. In our case, for example, I and hubby never change our mobile phone or laptop unless it's broken or no longer usable so that we can use the money in other things such as for our savings or for our long term project.

No matter how we agree or disagree in terms of money, as husbands and wives, let's NOT allow money to be the center of our relationship. Yes, MONEY is quite important but our happiness in marriage should not revolve around it. Afterall, it all depends on HOW we deal with money matters in our relationship. As long as we have each other, and of course, if Jesus is in our family, we are happy, content and blessed because we will be filled with LOVE, not just with fleeting material things.

Even if my post for Marriage Monday is a bit late, I've still tried to catch up as I want to read more about this interesting topic. Hop on with me to different posts by thinking Christian women all over the globe over at Chrysalis.


Susannah said...

First, congratulations on your 16 years together!

This statement is a blessing: we've never allowed it to ruin us, instead it has made us even stronger in our relationship as we figure things out and together we find solutions.

Apparently, you've both arrived at place of agrrement about money in your marriage. Well done!

Thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday, Nice A. Happy to have you link "late!"

Blessings, e-Mom @ Chrysalis

nice A said...

Thanks a lot, e-Mom. I'm still learning from Marriage Monday, from you and from all of the other members.

Denise said...

May your marriage continue to be blessed.

nice A said...

@Denise, thank you and may it be the same with yours.

kimmy said...

same here! my husband and I never fought over money. knowing that money matters are the most common problem couples face, we talked about it even before we got married and we promised each other never to allow it to come between us, and so far, no one have broken that promise yet.. 12 years and counting..

nice A said...

missing my blog:)

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